Sometimes I hide behind the term “Same-Gender-Loving” because the word “Gay” has such negative conations. Sometimes as invisible as we are to the world as black men, we are even more invisible to Black America as SGL men.
Sometimes I know that I, a Same-Gender-Loving individual am an aspect of God’s creations that many people do not yet understand. Sometimes, I don’t understand.
Sometimes I hide behind the postings that I use to inspire you. As positive as they are, at times I get very exhausted trying to inspire others, often finding my self emotionally drained.
Sometimes I think about loving someone and falling in love again. Sometimes real love can be the mirror that will keep away the ones who lie about commitment.
Sometimes I crave deep meaningful, spiritual relationship with someone who is comfortable with God and with himself. Someone with whom I can pray in the mornings, and hold tight through the night. Sometimes I yearn for the intimacy that I once found with a stranger that was lost the moment I told him to go away.
Sometimes the fear of growing old, alone inspires me to do and accomplish things I never knew I could. My human fears are the catalyst in which God has chosen as the avenue to glorify Him. However, Sometimes, I feel that God’s love is not enough. Sometimes, I break God’s heart. Sometimes it’s intentional. Sometimes I ask for forgiveness… Sometimes I rebel.
Sometimes, I take life too seriously; Sometimes I do not take it seriously enough. Sometimes I miss my twenty-year friendship; Sometimes I hate that I… Sometimes I love… Sometimes I…
Sometimes I sit at God’s feet and ask Him “why?” Sometimes I ask God for a life-long partner. Sometimes I wonder why I expect so much. Sometimes I wonder why I am willing to give so much.
Sometimes my skin is hungry and needs to be touched. Sometimes I crave the tender kiss, the passion, and the intimacy of a heartbeat next to mine. Someone who will allow me to satisfy his itch… or one whom will satisfy mine.
Sometimes I hide. Sometimes I crave. Sometimes I pray. Sometimes I hurt. Sometimes, I just smile…
Sometimes I know that I, a Same-Gender-Loving individual am an aspect of God’s creations that many people do not yet understand. Sometimes, I don’t understand.
Sometimes I hide behind the postings that I use to inspire you. As positive as they are, at times I get very exhausted trying to inspire others, often finding my self emotionally drained.
Sometimes I think about loving someone and falling in love again. Sometimes real love can be the mirror that will keep away the ones who lie about commitment.
Sometimes I crave deep meaningful, spiritual relationship with someone who is comfortable with God and with himself. Someone with whom I can pray in the mornings, and hold tight through the night. Sometimes I yearn for the intimacy that I once found with a stranger that was lost the moment I told him to go away.
Sometimes the fear of growing old, alone inspires me to do and accomplish things I never knew I could. My human fears are the catalyst in which God has chosen as the avenue to glorify Him. However, Sometimes, I feel that God’s love is not enough. Sometimes, I break God’s heart. Sometimes it’s intentional. Sometimes I ask for forgiveness… Sometimes I rebel.
Sometimes, I take life too seriously; Sometimes I do not take it seriously enough. Sometimes I miss my twenty-year friendship; Sometimes I hate that I… Sometimes I love… Sometimes I…
Sometimes I sit at God’s feet and ask Him “why?” Sometimes I ask God for a life-long partner. Sometimes I wonder why I expect so much. Sometimes I wonder why I am willing to give so much.
Sometimes my skin is hungry and needs to be touched. Sometimes I crave the tender kiss, the passion, and the intimacy of a heartbeat next to mine. Someone who will allow me to satisfy his itch… or one whom will satisfy mine.
Sometimes I hide. Sometimes I crave. Sometimes I pray. Sometimes I hurt. Sometimes, I just smile…
With your own words you formed me; breathe your wisdom over me so I can understand you. Now comfort me so I can live, really live. Psalm 119:73 (The Message)
5 comments:
I find this to be honest and candid. There is nothing wrong or shocking about your feelings. I think that maintaining a regular blog to inspire other SGL Christians can be very draining.
Truly inspired from deep within. Well said, well written.
From one soul to another I thank you for writing this...now I don't feel so alone when SOMETIMES I...
Wow...so real, so honest. This is what inspires & motivates people: the fact that you can open yourself enough to portray kinship & association. Its shocking, emotional, & comforting all in the same. This is a great message/scripture for me & the people.
well said, chk this A good day to die
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