1:00 AM in the morning.
I cannot sleep. A quietness within is guiding my thoughts. Sometimes it is good, and sometimes I cannot recognize myself. At times, it leads me to make wise choices about my life and situations in my life. I think about the passion that once burned so hot inside me, and I wonder if it has been replaced by this quietness deep within. What is it? Has something been captured, taken from me, as if my very essence has been drawn out of my body? Has my soul grown weak? On the other hand, is this quietness within me a foundation of strength to keep me sane?
What about happiness? As much as I would like to have a partner, I have become very comfortable being single. Not only comfortable being single, but comfortable not even dating.
Does my happiness depend on another? No matter what I believe, I dare not answer that question. I have to admit, it would make me happy right now to hold someone in my arms to help chase away this… However, I am reminded of the words from a close friend, “You are responsible for your own happiness.” I understand this concept, but for most people it is hard to grasp.
What about love? I have not been in love in a long time, and although I know it is wonderful, I do not remember what it feels like to be loved.
What about passion? What about betrayal? Damn. How did I get here!?
